Last Sunday Pastor Garry spoke on our attitude towards riches and it wasn't the typical pastor sermon on giving. It was a honest look at how we should view stuff and how stuff shouldn't change how we look at ourselves. On the way home from church, as we got on our exit, there was a young man on the side of the road with a sign that said, "broke-hungry". The kid had to be in his early twenties and was wearing very light clothing for weather in the 40's, wet and windy. He was literally shaking, one of those whole body shakes as he begged for money. I think I ask one of the dumbest questions ever, "You got any place to stay." The kid kind of look at me like, well, you dumb ----, what do you think?" Rather he politely gave me a blank stare. India and I gave him ten bucks and I told him I'd be back later to check on him. I told him to go get something to eat. I was tired and wanted to go home and take a nap and thought that after I took care of myself then I could check on him.
I got home and realized how selfish I had been. I wonder what the kid would have thought if I had said hop in and let's go to our house. He could have taken a hot shower and had some of my wonderful homemade vegetable soup and who knows maybe we could have figured out a place for him to stay for the night. I turned around and went back to find him. Call it what you will, but he had broken my heart. I kept thinking about my sons when they were that age and how as a father I would have given anything to anyone if they had reached out to my sons if they were in that situation. I thought about my little buddy who one day will be a young kid who, God forbid, might need someone to reach out and lend a helping hand. I was more concerned with my nap than the welfare of some poor lost soul (not talking in the spiritual sense). Or maybe I am. Maybe true spirituality is to see the needy and respond. The kid needed a whole helluva lot more than ten bucks. He was gone when I went to check on him. I drove up and down the interstate and no kid. I check the convenience stores and no kid. I check the fast food places and no kid. I check the grocery stores and no kid. I checked under the overpass to the interstate and no kid. I cried. I felt that God had put me in this kids path or he had put him in mine. I had missed a God given opportunity to minister. A opportunity missed. It has haunted me all week. It literally made me sick that Sunday afternoon.
I have come to understand that christianity is a lot more than "leading someone to the lord". It is more than studying the Word. It is more than kneeling in prayer. It is more than loving my spouse. It is more than loving my boys. It is more than being overtaken by the love of my grandson. I just don't know if I really know what the "more" is. One thing I do know is that I will forever see the look on that kids face when I gave him ten bucks and know that he was wanting more. A more is not money. So maybe I do know what the more is. Not my money but me.
And I do pray that someone truly reached out to the kid.
3 comments:
You did all you could at that moment. What you probably didn't see were all the cars coming from churches that flew past him, averted their eyes and didn't think a second thought about him.
What we do will never be enough. Not for anyone. But the fact that we even do something, I think, is, if not enough, then worth something.
Who knows, maybe you kept him at that interchange long enough for his parents to find him, a friend to find him or something. Maybe you looked like his dad and it made him want to go back to his family.
If you're going to let your imagination beat you up, you might as well let it lift you back up as well. :)
But, you're right, though. I think your reaction is more Christian than handing him a Gideon's Bible. That's for sure.
Jesus said to give to every hand that begged. Jesus didn't live in Berkeley, and Jesus didn't have a job.
But, I think when the world cuts in on us like that and we actually have the ears and eyes to respond, then we have finally quit "worshiping" Jesus, and begun to follow him.
I'm still working on that, though. It's so much easier to worship than follow.
I am touched and inspired pops. I have learned something from this as you have. I pray opportunity comes up again soon. Love you! Miss you! -Brook
Christianity isn't something you learn, it's something you live.
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